Dear Editor:

Thank you for your impersonal, form rejection note that took three months and required you to use an entire business-card sized slip of paper. With regrets, I must reject your rejection at this time. Please understand, I receive plenty of excellent rejections each month and it would be impossible to accept them all.

In the future, please include a SASE with your rejection so that I can reply with more ease.

Sincerely,

Your Bread and Butter